Thorough Guide to Solo BDSM

In this article, you will see the many possibilities for solo BDSM - from choosing gear and scenarios to self-aftercare and safety tips
By
reviewed
Reviewed by
Last updatedLast updated: February 16, 2024
JoyNights is reader-supported. We may earn a commission through products purchased using links on this page. Learn more about our process here

Those who are new to the world of BDSM or who don’t have a current partner to try their kinks with may need to attempt some solo BDSM. Though you may want to try to learn how to tie yourself up or sexually torture yourself, you won’t get the exact experience you would with a partner.

 This doesn’t mean that you can’t experiment with BDSM play. You just need to alter the way you perform the type of activities you’re interested in when by yourself. You should also learn how to safely perform the act since you are very limited to the options of cutting or unIf you are ready to try out solo BDSM play but need some self-BDSM ideas, keep reading for more information.

Is Solo BDSM Possible?

Trying out BDSM alone is definitely possible, plus it offers the advantage of allowing you to stick to what you like instead of trying to please a partner at the same time. You can fit your games into your schedule as well, making it even more about you.

Gear

If you’re going to try out some solo BDSM, there is a wide variety of stimulating toys and self-bondage gear to try out. You don’t need to keep a ton of toys on hand, so it’s best to focus on what you think you’ll use. You can always expand your collection later when needed. Some equipment to consider includes spanking paddles, ropes, scarves, vibrators, floggers, and so much more. 

Techniques

There are several different techniques to try out on your own, including some self-bondage torture, BDSM self-punishment Trusted Source That Time I Tried BDSM Therapy - The Atlantic Not all therapists take the gentle approach. www.theatlantic.com , rope play, sensation play, and even some exhibitionism if you love to have an audience for your games. You don’t need to try them all, either. Pick the ones that find interesting. You can always expand your activities later, adding extras or removing the ones you don’t enjoy.

Self BDSM Ideas

Those who are new to this type of play may need some solo BDSM ideas. Learning what each of these options has to offer is the first step to learning how to self-BDSM. The more time you spend exploring what each one is about, the more likely it is that you’ll find a few that turn you on.

1.Bondage


There are a wide variety of bondage techniques and positions when you’re with a partner. Unfortunately, you can’t try out all of those options when you’re alone since you have no one to tie you up in those intricate patterns and knots.

This doesn’t rule out self-bondage scenarios, though. You just need to use different types of self-bondage equipment, like handcuffs or straps on your ankles and a single hand, leaving the other one open to use as you see fit. There are also some simple self-bondage techniques using ropes for some basic knots or harnesses on your legs.

2. Orgasm control

Though domination/submission play may seem like a two-person game, you can use orgasm control for some mental domination. When you’re close to an orgasm, stop before you finish, then start over again. You can also give yourself a time limit for your orgasms, denying yourself pleasure if you run out of time before finishing. 

3. Flogging

If you require some punishment, flogging is a good technique to try out. Though it is a bit painful, depending on how hard you’re hitting yourself, it also releases some endorphins that can excite and please you. You can whip your legs, buttocks, and back, starting lightly and increasing the intensity as much as you like. Be careful with this type of technique, stopping if you feel lightheaded or unsteady on your feet. 

4. Tease senses

Sensation play is another solo BDSM technique that you can try out. You can use a variety of items you have at home or that you purchase from an adult store. You can use ice cubes for some cold play, clamps, and pegs for some pain mixed with pleasure, or even electrical stimulation toys for some mild electric shocks. The Doc Johnson The Stinger Electro Play Wand has a cattle prod design with visual sparks and a loud crack, which adds to the fun when you use it. Though it is a bit messy, using warm, colored candle wax lets you try some warm sensations while making you a living work of art. 

5. Virtual torture

Though you may not have a partner in the room with you, you may be able to find an online BDSM partner to do some virtual torture with you. This partner can give you orders to follow, telling you what actions to perform and what punishments to inflict on yourself. This is a good option for long-distance relationships or those who are new to BDSM but aren’t comfortable giving up complete control yet. There are several BDSM dating sites with video and chatrooms available to try out whenever you like.

6. Exhibitionism

Kink parties may not be readily available in your area, so for those who still want to try exhibitionism, there are some virtual options that you can check out. Many online parties allow you to perform in front of a camera, so you can entertain your audience in whatever manner you like. These online parties aren’t always as secure as you expect them to be, so anyone who wants to remain anonymous may want to use a mask, hide their personal details, and use a stage name to remain private. 

7. Male only


Though all of the BDSM techniques we described above are fun for everyone, there are some parts of this play that are for men only. For some male self-bondage activities, you can get try out some toys designed just for you. A chastity cage is one option, forcing you to stay calm and unaroused until the cage comes off. The CB-6000S is a short model made of polycarbonate and with 3 locking pins, a padlock, and a storage case. You can also try out a ball stretcher or tie up your penis and balls for some pleasurable pain.

8. Female only

Ladies also have some fantastic toys at their disposal for female self-bondage techniques. These include pussy pumps, clit clamps, nipple clamps, and a variety of vibrators for some amazing orgasms. You don’t need to use them all, so choose the ones you like and disregard the rest. 

Safety Advice

Though BDSM is the type of play that pushes your boundaries Trusted Source What Is So Appealing About Being Spanked, Flogged, Dominated, or Restrained? Answers from Practitioners of Sexual Masochism/Submission www.tandfonline.com , you still need to be as safe as possible when experimenting with the techniques we described above. This means doing some research before you try any of the scenarios we described above. It also means staying within your limits. A bit of pain is nice but too much and you may need a hospital visit.

Though solo bondage can be fun, you shouldn’t try putting anything around your neck except for your hands. If a knot gets too tight, you may not be able to release it before you pass out, which could lead to asphyxiation and death. You have control over your hands, though, squeezing and releasing as needed to keep you awake and enjoying the fun.

Final Thoughts

With all of the different types of BDSM techniques available for couples, it may be hard to picture doing these types of activities on your own. Luckily, for those singles or anyone who wants to try out these kinky games but isn’t ready to do so with a partner, solo BDSM is an option.

There are several techniques you can try out to please and punish yourself on your terms, giving you the exact stimulation you want. As well as a variety of scenarios to choose from, there are several toys and equipment you can add to your play to make it even more enjoyable. Of course, you still need to do some research and take your time to learn solo BDSM safety before getting started for the best experience possible.

 

References

1.
That Time I Tried BDSM Therapy - The Atlantic
Not all therapists take the gentle approach.
2.
What Is So Appealing About Being Spanked, Flogged, Dominated, or Restrained?
Answers from Practitioners of Sexual Masochism/Submission
Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *