Last updated: January 28, 2024There likely isn’t a man alive that doesn’t enjoy the amazing sensations a blowjob can provide. Unfortunately, a blowjob requires an extra person to do the actual task, which can’t always be as easy to find as you may hope. This leaves you with two choices. You can either forgo the pleasure until you find a willing participant or learn how to simulate a blowjob using one of the many male masturbator models on the market.
There are several different types to choose from with varying looks and styles, so you can pick a favorite or try out them all. If you don’t want to keep an automatic masturbator in your home or you can’t afford one of these toys right now, there are also a few DIY options available. Not all of them are as effective or as safe as others, so you do need to be careful which ones you try out.
The Fleshlight Turbo line of male masturbators look like flashlights but the opening and the interior feel similar to what you’d experience from an actual blowjob from another person. These toys, including the Fleshlight Turbo Thrust, are as close to the real thing as you can get since the materials used offer different textures that feel like the lips, mouth, and throat, so you get varying experiences depending on how you use it.
Male vibrators and masturbators come in varying shapes and sizes, including toys you place up against your member and a few you insert yourself into for the pleasurable sessions. These need to be generously lubricated to make the experience fun and stimulating without causing too much friction or chaffing. Many of these types of masturbators are also waterproof, so you can try them out in the shower or bathtub for some new, exciting experiences.
Blowjob strokers are similar to fleshlights since you insert yourself into them but these machines are a bit more simplistic in their design. They don’t include the head that looks like a mouth or any other female body part but they do still give you the sensation of having someone else in your bed with you. These toys are made of quality materials and offer varying patterns and textures to enjoy but many of them do cost a bit more than the average Fleshlight, so be sure to consider the price before you choose one of these toys.
A sleeve with a mouth opening, like the Doc Johnson Vicky Vette Blow Job Sucker Vibrating Masturbator, is another great option for those looking at new toys for simulated blowjobs. These look like the lower portion of a woman’s face, with a sculpted mouth, tongue, and throat, all of which include the textures needed to give you the pleasure you’re looking for. Some of them even have teeth, though these are softer than the real thing, adding to the experience without the pain. These types of toys are relatively low cost when compared to some other options, making them a great choice for those on a budget.
If you can’t afford the cost of a real blowjob simulating toy, there are a few DIY options you can try out to create your own sleeve. One option is the towel fleshlight, which you can make by inserting a tube of toothpaste into a latex glove, then rolling the glove in a towel. Secure the closed glove end with a hair tie and carefully remove the toothpaste. Then add another hair tie to the open end to keep it rolled as you use it.
You can also use a clean Pringles can with some sponges and a glove or a plastic bag. Put them together the same way you would with the glass method for the most stimulating results.
Another method is using a bottle of lubricant, lotion, or conditioner to create your homemade blowjob simulator. Choose one that has the right size of opening for your specific member. Then empty some of the contents until it is about half full. Insert your penis into it and gently squeeze the bottle to create the suction needed for some amazing sensations and orgasms.
What lifehacks to avoidThough you may have heard of a few other methods for simulating a blowjob, a few of the lifehacks offered are not always good ones to try out. The following options should be avoided.
Ham and other raw meats may have the texture you’re looking for in a simulated blowjob but there is a very good reason to avoid these options. This is because raw meat contains a variety of bacteria that are destroyed when you cook the meat. If you don’t cook it, those bacteria can get onto anything the meat touches, including your privates. This could cause an infection that will require a doctor’s visit and an awkward conversation about how it happened before you can get the medication needed to get rid of it. Despite what you’ve read online about using meat for your masturbatory needs, it is best to stick to safer, more sanitary methods.
Jelly is a safer option than ham or raw meat but it still isn’t the best option for simulating a blowjob. It is a good consistency to create both friction and suction and can even be heated to make it feel even more realistic but jelly still shouldn’t be included in your DIY blowjob simulator list. It is sticky and messy, plus you lose the opportunity to enjoy eating it after you use it this way. Jelly should be eaten, not used for sexual purposes.
Though a vacuum cleaner may seem like the obvious choice for these types of activities due to the suction and perfectly-sized opening of the hose, they are also the most dangerous lifehack there is when it comes to simulated blowjobs. Hundreds of men end up in the hospital after trying this out. You could end up with the hose vacuum-sealed to your crotch area or cause a great deal of damage to your privates that may not be repairable. Even on the low setting, this option is extremely dangerous, so leave the vacuum for cleaning instead of bringing it in for some bedroom fun.
Though a popular 90’s movie made this seem like a good option to simulate a blowjob or intercourse, apple pie is not meant to stimulate you enough to give you an orgasm. This isn’t because it won’t work to give you the sensations you’re looking for. It is similar to the jelly issue, with it resulting in a sticky mess all over you and whatever surface you’re using it on. It will also fall apart as you’re using it, so it may not even last as long as needed to finish the job. Apple pie is best left for eating rather than used for sexual stimulation.
When you’re by yourself, you have to use your imagination to get the same type of stimulation you would get when there is another person in your bed with you. Luckily, it is easy to learn how to simulate a blowjob when you’re on your own.
There are a variety of different male masturbation models on the market for you to choose from, giving you a toy that is designed strictly for this purpose. These come in a variety of shapes and sizes, so you can choose the one you like best to give you the pleasure you’re looking for. Many DIY options allow you to create your own masturbatory tool, as long as you are using safe and sanitary materials to keep you clean and healthy.
