How to Make Light Bondage a Part of Your Sex Life

This article will explain the elegance of light bondage - from gear choice and beginner tips to the great variety of scenarios to try
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Last updatedLast updated: September 07, 2021
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When people hear the word bondage, they likely picture the most hardcore BDSM scenarios there are. Of course, this isn’t the only type of bondage there is. There is a wide variety of restraints and methods that you can choose from for some light BDSM play without getting too intense too quickly.

If you’re new to the world of BDSM and are interested in trying light bondage without taking things too far, there are many options available to you. It’s best to try this type of play with a trusted partner, especially the first few times. This will ensure that you’re as comfortable as possible when you get started with your new games. There are also many different light bondage techniques to choose from, so you can start small and work your way up to more elaborate games. For more light bondage ideas, keep reading.

What is Light BDSM?

Light bondage, also called vanilla bondage, is one aspect of BDSM play, where the participants use submission and restraints during their games. These types of games usually start small, with the use of some soft, simple restraints at first, with more complicated aspects added later if the couple chooses to expand their sexual reach. Sometimes they stick with the light bondage gear instead, enjoying the tip of the iceberg rather than delving below the surface.

Toys

How to Make Light Bondage a Part of Your Sex Life
There are several different toys that you can add to your light bondage play. These include restraints, like rope, scarves, handcuffs, or padded cuffs. The
Bondage Boutique Kinky Couple Restraint Kit is a beginner’s kit with 4 cuffs and an eye mask, all made of faux fur for increased comfort. You can also add some toys for punishments or mild pain, like spanking paddles or clit clamps.

Punishments

For some people, punishments could be involved with light bondage, such as a mild spanking. These types of punishments are doled out when the submissive isn’t following the rules or orders set by the dominant. 

Positions

There are no specific light bondage positions, so you can try any that you have in mind, assuming the restraints you are using allow it. You can tie your partner face up or down on the bed, in a chair, or anywhere else you like. The sky is the limit, as long as both of you are into what’s happening.

Techniques

When it comes to light bondage, there are a wide variety of techniques you can use. These include a wide variety of light bondage toys and scenarios, though you want to remember that light bondage isn’t meant to cause pain. Instead, it’s designed to be fun and exciting. It doesn’t even need to include intercourse since the power over another individual is the enjoyable part for some light bondage players.

Light Bondage Tips

If you’re new to this type of sexual activity, you may not know where to start. The following light bondage tips can help ensure that the experience is enjoyable for both of the people involved, maintaining everyone’s safety and comfort level.

Choose the safe word

The safe word is one of the most important tools of BDSM play, even in light bondage, since this word allows you to protect yourself against anything you aren’t comfortable with or if the scenarios you’ve chosen aren’t as fun as you expected them to be. 

When choosing a safe word, be sure to pick something that you wouldn’t normally use during your light bondage scenarios. You can use colors, like the ones on a traffic light, using red for stop, yellow to let your partner know they are close to crossing a boundary and need to pull back, and green for keep going. Other options are fruit names, household appliances, or any other word that makes sense for you.

Prepare for aftercare

All types of BDSM require aftercare when the scenario is done and you’re preparing to get back to the real world. Though with light bondage, there should be few wounds to nurse, your Trusted Source Aftercare BDSM - After Care Sex Definition How to What the definition of aftercare, or the care of your partner after sex, really means, and common aftercare scenarios and why it’s so important. www.cosmopolitan.com could include cuddling, hugging, making food, bringing water, and talking. If you don’t live together, offering a ride home can also be considered aftercare since you’re ensuring your partner gets home safely.

Discuss scenarios

How to Make Light Bondage a Part of Your Sex Life
There are a wide variety of different scenarios to try out. These include any type of scene that you’re into, like professor/student, employer/employee, homeowner/maid, or master/slave. You can try some light male bondage where you tie up your man or he can tie you up. You can even take turns being the submissive if you want to try switching. Even homosexuals can try out some gay light bondage, choosing the scenario that they like best or trying out several to see which ones are the most enjoyable.

The most important part of this discussion is to choose a scenario together. Not everyone is comfortable with all of the options, so be open and honest about what you like and don’t like to ensure the scenes go well and keep everyone satisfied.

Light BDSM Scene Ideas

For those interested in some kinky new light BDSM scenes, there are several different options to choose from, including a variety of scenes and light bondage toys to enhance the experience. You can try them all or just stick to a few select favorites.

1. Pet play

Pet play is popular with BDSM beginners since it allows them a safe outlet to explore these activities. For this type of scene, one or both of the participants role-play as a specific pet. This means that they imitate the animals they are pretending to be, including crawling on hands and knees, making the proper sounds, and even being petted. Sometimes this even includes wearing a collar and leash, like the Bondage Boutique Lead Me On Soft Collar and Leash, which includes a padded collar with Velcro straps for easy adjustment and removal when the game is done.

2. Blindfold

How to Make Light Bondage a Part of Your Sex Life
Using a blindfold is another option for some light bondage play. This prevents the submissive from knowing what their partner is going to do to them until it is actually happening. You can buy a special blindfold from a store, use a sleep mask, or secure a necktie or scarf over your partner’s eyes. This is also a nice way to ease into these types of games since you can add a blindfold to your regular sexual activities without restraints or other toys.

3. Shibari

Shibari Trusted Source Shibari: pushing boundaries in the ancient Japanese practice of knot tying | Stage | The Guardian Daniel Kok and Luke George explore the delicate rules of submission and domination in shibari while binding each other, and audience members, in rope www.theguardian.com is a form of Japanese bondage that involves restraining your partner using ropes. This practice isn’t easy to learn since the ropework and knots can be quite complicated, though you can start practicing with your partner to learn this skill. You likely won’t get the best results the first few times you try it but with enough practice, your skills will increase, allowing you to secure your partner in a specific position that allows you to do what you like to them.

4. Sex swing

Installing a sex swing in your home is another great way to experiment with some light bondage. There are a few options to choose from, some using a mix of straps to hold your partner up, while others have seats or hammock areas for higher comfort levels. They also include straps for the wrists and ankles, so you can use them however you see fit. 

5. Handcuffs

Handcuffs are one of the most popular light bondage restraint options there are. There are heavy-duty metal ones, light fluffy options, or even some comfortable bracelet cuffs to try out, so you can get the ones that appeal most to both of you. If you’re using handcuffs, be sure the key is close at hand before you lock your partner in place. Handcuffs also add some extra scenarios to the mix, like police officer/criminal or prison guard/prisoner.

6. Bondage tape

Using masking or duct tape can be painful to remove. That’s why those who want to add some tape to their fantasies stick with bondage tape instead. This type of tape is specifically designed for use during BDSM play since it won’t cause any pain when you’re wearing or removing it. Bondage tape is self-adhesive, so it won’t stick to your skin when you’re wrapping it around your wrists or ankles. Instead, the tape only sticks to itself, so you can use it however you like without hurting anyone. It is also more comfortable than other types of tape, plus it is easy to remove when you’re done with it.

7. Spreader bar

While some restraints still offer some movement, the spreader bar is designed to be rigid. The bar is placed between the ankles, with cuffs holding it in place. It is designed to keep those legs spread apart so you can’t close them until the spreader bar is removed. This gives your partner full access to your most private areas for as long as he likes.

8. Zip ties

How to Make Light Bondage a Part of Your Sex Life
Zip ties are another great option for light bondage play, though they are a bit more restrictive when used. They are rigid and thin, so when you’re strapped in place using zip ties, it can be a bit painful if you pull against them. This can be part of the fun if you like a bit of pain with your pleasure but you and your partner should also check them frequently to ensure there aren’t any serious injuries caused by these restraints. You’ll also need some scissors or a knife to remove them, so be sure one is close by before you begin.

9. Under-bed restraints

If you’re going to make restraints a permanent addition to your BDSM play, getting some under-bed restraints may be the best option. These restraints are connected beneath your mattress, with straps that extend to the upper four corner areas to secure your wrists and ankles during your scenarios. Not only are these restraints fun to use, but you can also tuck them away under the mattress when your play is done.

10. Other restraints

Though the restraint options we’ve described above are all great options, there are also a few others you can try out. You can do some Christmas light bondage using long strings of holiday lights to secure your partner. You do need to ensure the bulbs don’t get too hot, though, or some nasty burn could be part of the game. You can also use scarves, neckties, t-shirts, leggings, pantyhose, cotton or nylon ropes, or anything else you have on hand.

Final thoughts

Though you may be interested in some aspects of BDSM play, not everyone is ready to dive into the most hard-core activities right away, if ever. For those who prefer to keep things a bit less intense, there are a wide variety of light bondage techniques, toys, and scenes to choose from.

You can experiment with some pet play or add a blindfold to your usual sexual activities to get started. There are also several different restraint options to choose from, allowing you to secure your partner in place or even in a specific position. With so many options to choose from, even the most vanilla lover can find a way to add some light bondage to their routine.

References

1.
Aftercare BDSM - After Care Sex Definition How to
What the definition of aftercare, or the care of your partner after sex, really means, and common aftercare scenarios and why it’s so important.
2.
Shibari: pushing boundaries in the ancient Japanese practice of knot tying | Stage | The Guardian
Daniel Kok and Luke George explore the delicate rules of submission and domination in shibari while binding each other, and audience members, in rope
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