Safest Tips for BDSM Choking Scenarios

This article will provide you with instructions to BDSM chocking - safety advice, 8 tips to make it pleasing and first aid instructions
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Last updatedLast updated: March 03, 2024
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BDSM relationships involve various plays, including choking. While choking can be fun, things can quickly go downhill if care is not taken. Essentially, choking can be quite dangerous when done wrongly. You can’t be surprised about this or are you? Constricting someone’s airways is always going to be a dangerous move.

However, choking can be done safely if the right steps are taken. This article will discuss the dangers of BDSM choking, important safety tips, and the conditions you must satisfy before engaging in a safe practice. Even though adhering to the safety conditions can reduce the risk of trouble, we can’t rule out danger. Hence, we’ll also explain how you can get out of trouble.

Besides, there are numerous ways to explore BDSM choking. So, if you’re seeking to learn all about safe choking, help is here. Ride along with us as we dissect everything about BDSM choking.

What Chocking Does to Your Body

As we hinted earlier, choking is basically someone restricting your airflow. And you know what that means; that’s stopping you from breathing properly. Even though choking puts you in danger, it can provide some sexual and psychological satisfaction.

As a submissive, you most probably enjoy being choked and overpowered by your dominant. Knowing that your dom is completely in control can drive you crazy in ecstasy. Besides that, choking can give you a lightheaded feeling that may feel good. Also, it can provide a euphoric feeling that raises all the senses. Additionally, choking can turn you on for kinky sex.

Dangers to consider

Since the beginning of this article, we’ve not shied away from the important fact that BDSM choking comes with some dangers that must be considered before practicing. Moreover, choking is a form of breath play that partially or fully blocks the supply of oxygen. With the absence of oxygen, many things could go wrong.

Some of the dangers you must consider before engaging in BDSM choking include:
  • Brain damage
  • Irregular heart rates
  • Cardiac arrest
  • Difficulty breathing
  • Coughs
  • Hoarse voice
  • Headaches
  • Difficulty swallowing
  • Lightheadedness
  • Red spots on the face
  • Death

Safety Tips for Choking Kink

Inasmuch as we understand how dangerous BDSM choking can be, we won’t ask you not to do it, especially if you have a choking kink or fetish. Rather, we’ll provide you important tips that can help you practice it safely without any risk of brain damage, cardiac arrest, or even death. Below are some safety tips to master:

  • Always develop safe words before engaging in BDSM choking so that the sub can tell you when to stop and you can understand them.
  • Come up with gestures that can help your sub communicate with you in case they can’t vocalize their feelings. Such gestures can include the sub holding up their fist or snapping their fingers.
  • Discuss health conditions in advance. If the sub has asthma, a breathing or heart condition, or a history of anxiety issues, you should proceed with caution or better still, avoid choking them.
  • Don’t practice BDSM choking while any of the participants is under any influence of alcohol or drugs.

How to Make Choking Benefit for Both

Despite the risks involved in choking, it can still be beneficial to both the dom and the sub. However, this involves learning how to choke in BDSM properly. Below are various ways to explore BDSM choking, so that both parties can benefit:

1.  Always discuss

The number one condition for safe BDSM choking is communication. Specifically, you should always discuss with your partner before choking them. Of course, you can surprise your partner with different sexual plays, but choking is not one of them due to the health implications.

Besides, choking your partner without their prior knowledge is a bad surprise and can open the door to all sorts of troubles. Having a conversation with your sub before doing BDSM choking can help you understand their limit and if it’s safe for them.

Do you want another reason why it’s bad to surprise your partner by choking them? Choking them suddenly can trigger past trauma that you’re not aware of. Even if there’s no trauma to be triggered, you need to know whether your partner is cool with being choked.

Furthermore, you should never practice nonconsensual choking because you might be crossing the thin line between consent and abuse. And we don’t need to remind you that abuse has no business with BDSM choking. Nonconsensual choking is violence and abuse as reported by The Guardian, Trusted Source The fatal, hateful rise of choking during sex | Domestic violence | The Guardian Too many women’s lives are ending after what those accused of their deaths say were ‘sex games gone wrong’. But how did strangling ever become normalised? www.theguardian.com so you’ll do well to only choke someone who has given their consent.

Also, never forget that BDSM is built on mutual consent. Therefore, any practice that doesn’t involve consent is basically abuse and that should never happen.

Besides, after getting the consent of your partner, you should both discuss expectations. You should understand how they like to be choked (gentle or intense) and when they like to be choked—whether multiple times during sex or only during orgasm.

2.  Learn anatomy

By now, you know that choking constricts airflow but how does it do that? Choking applies pressure to the blood-rich carotid arteries on either side of the neck. If you didn’t know, these arteries transport blood rich in oxygen from someone’s heart to their brain. So, if the person is choked, the implication is the restriction of blood supply to their brain.

Hence, if choking goes on for far too long, it can cause brain damage and permanent damage to the larynx and carotid arteries. However, some people apply pleasure to the windpipe while choking which is even more dangerous. Besides that, applying pressure to the arteries seems to create a giddy and euphoric feeling that heightens sensations.

Before going ahead with choking your partner, you should learn the anatomy of choking. The anatomy tells you that choking for too long will cause the person being choked to pass out. So, you’ll need to press your sub’s neck and figure out the pressure that works for them.

3.  Learn to control strength

One thing you can’t afford while choking your partner is losing control and going beyond your boundaries. If you’re going to practice safe BDSM choking, you’ll need to learn to control the intensity. Going beyond the limit of your partner can have devastating consequences.

4.  Train first

One of the negatives of porn is projecting a false reality. Frankly, you’ll be causing yourself and your partner a whole lot of trouble if you’re learning to choke from porn. Essentially, porn is a poor way to learn choking. Ignore porn and train yourself. As we mentioned earlier, you shouldn’t squeeze your partner’s windpipe. Rather, press either side of their esophagus.

Besides, efficient training will help you learn how much strength and pressure your partner’s body can withstand. This can go a long way in ensuring safe choking sessions.

5.  Be mindful

Another condition you need to satisfy for safe BDSM choking is being mindful of what you’re doing. You should always be in control of the process because a one-second lapse of concentration could cause trouble. Therefore, you should never get carried away while you choke your partner.

Moreover, choking your sub under the influence of alcohol or drugs can cause you to lose focus which can be dangerous, especially when your partner needs you to stop immediately. If you’re not mindful of what you’re doing, you could miss your sub’s communication asking you to stop, thus getting yourself and your partner into avoidable trouble.

6.  Safeword

A huge condition for safe BDSM choking is communication. Since things can go wrong in a flash, quick communication can be the saving grace. Effective communication in choking requires coming up with safe words that your partner can use to get you to stop. Remember that consent plays a significant role here, so the sub will have the final say.

Besides, safewords can be single-syllable words that can be called very easily. You can even incorporate the traffic light system in such a way that saying ‘yellow’ asks your dom to slow down and ‘red’ asks them to stop immediately.

However, verbal safewords can be impractical in some situations when it’s hard to speak. So, you need to create nonverbal signals (safewords) too. Some nonverbal cues include raising your hands, snapping your fingers, shaking your head, tapping your partner, and dropping a metallic object on the floor. Doing any of those should tell your partner to stop.

7.  Use equipment

Although the common method of choking is using the bare hands, other materials can help. One of them is BDSM choking collar. With the collar, it’s easier to maintain a specific pressure. However, if the collar is pulled too hard, there could be trouble.

Besides choking collar, introducing other BDSM equipment into the play won’t do any harm. Think about using a nicely designed clit clamp to squeeze your sub’s clit while you choke them. If that doesn’t sound exciting enough, you can even bring a high-quality spanking paddle into the mix. That means you can spank them while you choke them, allowing you to heighten the sensations.

Another option is getting your sub to wear a face strapon while you choke them. Of course, you should find the best face strapon—most preferably a breathable gag—for this to avoid safety issues. If you do this, you’ll need to be extra alert to your partner’s communication.

Or better still, go for a bondage kit that comprises multiple BDSM equipment. One that has been a subject of glowing reviews is the Bondage Boutique Dominant Dream Bondage Kit. The 6-piece kit is made from suede and faux leather for BDSM play. Also, the kit includes cuffs, flogger, lead, ball gag, and blindfold for a sensational choking experience.

If that didn’t tickle your fancy, maybe the cheaper and equally high-quality Bondage Boutique Black Rose Collar with Nipple Clamps will. This kit includes a stylish collar as well as a lead and nipple clamp set for various levels of bondage plays. There are also O-ring clip connectors available to add or remove accessories.

8.  Aftercare

Aftercare is a necessary final step for every BDSM action. After you’re done choking your sub, you should try to refresh them physically and mentally. You can stroke each other’s bodies, cuddle under soft blankets, or do any other thing that your partner finds refreshing—mentally and physically.

In Case of Danger

Frankly, you can’t rule out danger when it comes to choking. As we’ve hinted before, the implication of extreme BDSM choking is your partner passing out. To prevent things from getting worse, you’ll need to perform Cardiopulmonary Resuscitation (CPR) on your partner. And there’s no way to perform CPR if you don’t learn it.

Besides, CPR is mainly performed in two ways: hands-only and rescue breaths. Hands-only CPR is basically chest compression. And it involves placing the heel of your hand on the breastbone at the center of your sub’s chest, placing your other hand on top of your first hand, and interlocking your fingers according to the UK's National Health Service (NHS). Trusted Source First aid - CPR
- NHS
Find out how to safely use cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) for adults, children over one year of age and babies under one year of age. www.nhs.uk

On the other hand, CPR with rescue breaths requires performing chest compressions while giving rescue breaths. Rescue breaths require sealing your mouth over the victim’s mouth and blowing steadily into their mouth.

Final Thoughts

Without any doubt, choking can add unique sensations to BDSM play despite its many safety concerns. However, since choking can’t be actually obliterated from BDSM action, the best move is to ensure the safety of the sub always. This article contains safety tips that you must follow to ensure that your partner’s health is not threatened while you choke them.

Besides that, the importance of communication can’t be overemphasized. BDSM choking requires effective communication to be done properly and safely. Additionally, aftercare must be taken seriously and administered after every session. Lastly, you must learn the safety procedures that can be administered in case of danger to ensure that your partner is not left without care when it matters the most.

References

1.
The fatal, hateful rise of choking during sex | Domestic violence | The Guardian
Too many women’s lives are ending after what those accused of their deaths say were ‘sex games gone wrong’. But how did strangling ever become normalised?
2.
First aid - CPR
- NHS
Find out how to safely use cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) for adults, children over one year of age and babies under one year of age.
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