Last updated: March 05, 2024Most men will appreciate receiving a blowjob. Sex should be fun and pleasurable, for everyone involved. If you want to pleasure your partner but aren’t sure how to give a blowjob, we are here to help. Even though you are giving pleasure to your partner, it does not mean that you can’t enjoy it, too. We’ll offer some suggestions on positions to try out, toys to use, and techniques that will really wow him. When you know how to give an amazing blowjob, not only will your partner be satisfied but you can be proud of what you can achieve.
Being in control of somebody else’s sexual experience should feel powerful. You get to be a part of someone experiencing pure joy. Giving a blowjob should not feel like a chore. If it does, then talk to your partner and explain how you feel. This sentiment usually results from a lack of mutual pleasure, which is not part of a healthy relationship.
In a healthy relationship, you will want to make your partner happy because you know that they want to make you happy, too. The goal of giving a blowjob can be your partner having an orgasm or it can be part of him then giving you an orgasm. Sexual acts are varied and it’s fun and healthy to mix them up.
The process of giving a blowjob is fairly simple. You use your mouth to stimulate your partner enough that he ejaculates. There are, however, many nuances that will decide how successful and pleasurable it is.
Any road to an orgasm needs to include some measure of foreplay, a certain level of intimacy, and an awareness of your partner’s needs.
While you can decide to give a blowjob to anyone, regardless of how long you know them, you at least need to trust the other person. This trust includes knowing you won’t be forced into any action you don’t want to do. Your partner should trust you that you won’t intentionally hurt them.
Giving a blowjob can end with your partner ejaculating into your mouth or you both may decide to have him ejaculate onto your body or into a towel. You may even stop before this happens and engage in intercourse instead. A blowjob can be the main event or part of prolonged foreplay. You can even go further and have your partner perform oral sex on you at the same time.
One issue that most people are worried about when it comes to blowjobs is a gag reflex. Almost everyone has a gag reflex, so it is quite normal to consider it. If your partner is longer than average or thrusts too hard, it can make you gag, which can be painful.
As for your end, try to take more control of the situation. Use your hands, both to grip his penis and control the movements, and to press his body down so he can’t thrust too far upward.
You can also try these best flavored lubes, which can help make the experience more pleasurable. They mask the taste of pre-cum and can help you relax so your gag reflex isn’t as strong.
As with any form of sexual activity, foreplay is often overlooked but immensely important. Here are some ways you can prepare both you and your partner for an explosive blowjob.
Communication will always be the most important part of sex. Knowing what you like and what your partner likes means you can relax, experiment, and enjoy yourselves.
Perhaps you want to roleplay and use a blowjob as part of the act. Maybe you want to experiment with the submissive side of your personality and have him pretend to force you into giving oral sex.
You can also talk about whether you want the blowjob to end in a climax or whether either of you wants to stop before then going on to other sexual acts.
Other important considerations you can talk about are whether your partner wants you to go slow or fast, what toys you want to try out, and any favorite positions.
Finally, you can discuss whether this blowjob will be all about him or whether he will be reciprocating on you afterward. Perhaps you want to mix things up and even try a sixty-nine position.
Instead of going right to the main event, take your time teasing your partner. Start at the top of his body and work your way lower. Kiss your partner on the lips and then kiss all around his body. As you work your way lower, avoid his grown and kiss down his inner thigh instead. He will think you are heading toward his penis and be distraught, in a good way, as you hold off on him and continue to tease him.
While you’re kissing his body, use your hands to explore further. Again, use gentle strokes but just graze his groin area. It may seem mean but his whimpers mean he is begging you to touch him, which will make the experience all the better.
Find a comfortable position for both of you. We’ll suggest different positions in a further section but you want to be relaxed enough that there is no immediate rush to finish things off. The more time you can take, the better it will be for both of you.
The bed is the most common place to give a blowjob. You can also try out a couch, especially if there are extra pillows.
Blowjobs can get a bit messy, so it’s always good to have them take place with a blanket or towel that you can easily wash afterward. If you don’t want to swallow, you might want to have an extra towel or cup close at hand to discreetly spit into afterward.
As we mentioned earlier, be sure to use your hands to set the scene. You can apply a mixture of soft and hard massage to different parts of his body. Work specific muscles to help him relax and use your hands to tease him before lightly stroking him.
During this stage, you can try different forms of pressure. Some men really respond to their nipples being stimulated. These Bondage Boutique Adjustable Nipple Clamps are easy to place on nipples. They will cut off the blood flow and then when you remove them, will create a more sensitive area.
Using scented massage oil can make for a more relaxing sensation and you can create a deeper rhythm with it. Take your time and make the whole experience as sensual as possible.
As you move your way around your partner’s body, take the time to whisper naughty thoughts into his ear. Tell him how his body feels, what you like touching and seeing, and tease him about what is soon to come.
You can also tell him how aroused you are. Any good partner will want to ensure you are getting something out of the act, and if you explain your own thoughts and feelings, it will feel more like mutual pleasure.
Even when you are giving a blowjob, don’t be afraid to break off for a moment and tell him what you are feeling. A quick break can give you a chance to stretch your mouth and a change in tempo can keep him on his toes.
Once you’re face to face with your partner’s penis, take the opportunity to explore. Use your hands, mouth, and tongue to explore his penis and testicles. Use kisses to tempt him and make him crazy, slowly getting nearer and nearer to the target, but backing down at the last minute.
Listen to the sounds he is making to see how you affect him. Any time he moans, repeat your action. If he’s being too quiet, move around and try to surprise him. Take the opportunity to show him you’re in charge and he is at your mercy. You know that you could finish him off in just a few minutes but you’re choosing to prolong the action. This can be torturous for your partner but the payoff will be huge.
The general rule of giving a blowjob is to start out slow and then gradually increase your tempo. Save the fast movements for the end. You can, of course, alternate pacing to add an element of teasing.
Near the end, you will need to increase your pacing quite a bit to bring about an orgasm. If the pace is too much for your mouth, use your hands to help at the bottom of his shaft. This is also useful if your partner has a larger penis or is thrusting too hard and it is making you gag.
Whether you are new to giving a blowjob are want to improve your skills, here are some simple but effective tips to increase the pleasure for both people involved.
Not sure what a frenulum is? Turns out the body part can refer to a part of your mouth or a part of the penis. The frenulum Trusted Source Anatomy, Abdomen and Pelvis, Penis - PubMed The penis is a male organ that is used for reproduction and urination which is located within the urogenital triangle between the perineal membrane superiorly and deep perineal fascia inferiorly. pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov is that small tag of skin on the underside of the penis. It is right between the head of the penis and the shaft.
Both circumcised and uncircumcised men will have a frenulum and it is incredibly sensitive. Teasing this area will create immense pleasure in your partner, so it is beneficial to find it with your tongue and keep coming back to it.
So often we think about blowjobs as using our lips but the truth is the real star is our tongue. Keep a tight seal with your lips but use your tongue to add texture and movement. Tickling the frenulum or applying pressure to it can greatly enhance your blowjob.
There are many parts to a penis and when giving a blowjob you want to target all of them. The head is the most sensitive so play around but be gentle. You can take your time and kiss up and down his shaft to warm him up. And, if you need a break and want to keep him on his toes, stop any sucking and go back to kissing. It will keep him constantly on edge.
You can use a mixture of your mouth and your hand if this is more comfortable. This is especially useful if he has a longer length and you have a gag reflex. Place your hand around the base of his penis to hold it steady and use your mouth on the middle part and the head.
Work your tongue and be creative. Swirl parts of his shaft and head and add long and slow licks to tease him. Increase your tempo to get him going and then slow down to hear him groan in defeat.
Wait for the end to really work the whole penis. At this stage, depending on the position you are in, you may need your hands to work more to keep the tempo up. Your partner may also hold your head and if you are okay with this, lean into it to show that he still has some control over the situation.
Even if you don’t know a lot about blowjobs, you are surely aware that you should avoid teeth. While teeth should be firmly held behind your lips, if you feel comfortable and know your partner, you can bring them out for a bit of gentle teasing.
Subtle nips from the teeth or light grazing can have a deeper sensation to a blowjob. Be sure to quickly replace your teeth with your tongue for a loving caress. The combination of pain and pleasure can be quite arousing.
Just be sure to listen to your partner. A sharp inhale followed by a moan means you’ve used the right pressure. A sudden jerking away from your mouth means it was probably too hard. For those who aren’t sure about your partner’s body language, simply check in with them after to see if you were too hard or even too gentle.
Temperature play is always fun and a good way to keep your partner on his toys. You can tell him what is happening ahead of time or surprise him and thrill at his reaction. While you can add cold to a blowjob, you don’t want to go overboard. Freezing his penis will not put him in the mood for more.
Grab an ice cube from your freezer and put it in a cup near you. Then, place it in your mouth. The ice will cool your mouth and when you next suck on your partner, he will gasp in surprise at the sensation. The warmth of your mouth will take over almost instantly, however, providing a welcome contrast between the two sensations.
For those hesitant to go the extreme with cold, you can also lightly blow on the head of your partner’s penis for a cooling sensation.
Play around with your tongue and coldness. Again, if you place an ice cube in your mouth, use the coldness of your tongue to lick his head or shaft. Then, engulf the whole penis in your mouth to warm him up.
While some men are traditionalists and want a blowjob to be only about your mouth, most men are happy to add some more fun to the event. Trying out new toys can be fun for both of you.
Now that men are becoming more comfortable talking about what sexually excites them, they may be more able to explain that they want some anal stimulation mixed in with their blowjob. There are many prostate massagers that can give your partner that needed stimulation and, when combined with the feeling of your mouth, can bring them to new heights of ecstasy.
The Aneros Eupho Syn Trident is a great product to consider. It is made from soft silicone and is easy to insert. It has a few subtle curves to hit the prostate and the flared base means you can place it in exactly the right position.
There are many fun positions you can try out when giving a blowjob. If you intend on taking your time, we suggest finding a position that is the most comfortable. This way you can enjoy yourself more and take the time to truly tantalize your partner.
One of the sexiest positions to give a blowjob is if you are on your knees. This position denotes a submissive attitude. Whether you are into BDSM or not, enacting your submissive side can be a real thrill for everyone involved.
If you can, find somewhere comfortable to kneel. Wooden floors may be okay but tile is very hard and you might not be able to sustain the motions for very long. Carpet is the best flooring. If your partner is very tall, you may also be able to get on your knees on the bed for an even better scenario.
As you give your partner a blowjob, look up into his eyes. He may be looking down at you and that eye contact can create a more powerful sensation. You can also better read his body language. If his eyes are closed and he has an ecstatic look on his face, then you know you are going at it the right way.
Some people don’t want to look up for fear of seeing their partner disinterested. However, if you are with anyone with manners, they will be enjoying all that you are doing to them. If you see that your partner isn’t as ecstatic as you want, however, you can take the opportunity to change things up and check back to see what his reaction is.
A comfortable position for both people is if you are on your stomach. In this scenario, your partner lies on their back and you then either kneel close to your partner or lie down. Your partner can also be propped up slightly, especially if you are both on a bed.
In this way, you can stretch out and not feel so cramped. It also gives you more opportunities to move your body next to your partner. Your bare legs may feel good on his legs. You can move along and join in on the actions.
This position is not for everyone but if you want to take the submissive attitude further, you can lie on your back with your head hanging off the bed. In this position, your partner has more control and may even grab onto your head to control the thrusting. Again, if you are not comfortable with this happening, make sure you tell your partner.
With this position, there is a real possibility of deep-throating. If you are excited to try the position but want to use something that will make it easier, we suggest looking at this list of the best deep-throat sprays. They gently numb your throat, and taste good, too.
There’s nothing revolutionary about laying on your side but if you want to try a new position this might be something to consider. For this to work, the man is usually sitting up in bed and the woman is then laying on the side of him. Instead of giving a blowjob right in front of your partner, you can subtly change the angle, which can be interesting.
Here are a few more blowjob tips about specific scenarios.
There is no reason that sexual activity has to stop at a particular age. In this recent study Trusted Source Sexuality and old age - PubMed Sexuality in older people is a multifaceted field of study. Ageing may offer opportunities for and restrictions on sexuality. pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov , there is now an understanding that as people age they still want to engage in sexual acts.
With old age comes new challenges, including the loss of teeth and the wearing of dentures. If you are worried about your dentures coming out, perhaps it is best to forego them and attempt a blowjob without teeth.
When doing this, more effort will be placed on your jaw. But, even if you don’t have teeth, you will still have your mouth palate, which is quite powerful. And, if anything, the absence of teeth means no accidental biting or scratching!
If you have braces, either as a teenager or an adult, you might be reluctant to give a blowjob. That is a lot of metal in your teeth and it can cause more pain than just an accidental grazing of your teeth.
However, the same tips apply. Move your lips over your teeth to create a better seal. You might want to practice on your own, either on your fingers or a banana to get a sense of how it will feel.
Then, when you are ready to give your partner a blowjob, go slowly. You might not be able to finish if you are worried about the sensation, but you can still use a blowjob as a form of foreplay.
Having a small mouth isn’t a problem, except if your partner has a very large penis. This can take extra effort and you might find yourself feeling very uncomfortable.
The trick here is to practice, practice, practice. You might not be able to complete your first blowjob, but this is true for most people, regardless of the size of their mouth.
If you are feeling nervous, always talk to your partner. They should respect you and your comfort level enough to not put pressure on you. Then, try your best. As soon as the feeling is uncomfortable or if you need a break, simply stop. Then, the next time, try to last longer.
You can also rely more on toys if you want to give your mouth a break. This list of the best prostate Aneros, or prostate massagers, can increase the sensations your partner is feeling, which takes the pressure off of you.
First, we need to caution that safety is always the number one priority with sex. Giving a blowjob to your partner while he is driving can sound sexy but needs a lot of caution. Make sure there aren’t a lot of other cars on the road. Also, make sure your partner doesn’t need to concentrate on complex tasks like making a lot of lane changes.
Usually, the most dangerous part of giving a blowjob in a car is when your partner climaxes. Give him a warning if you are going to amp up your actions and listen if he asks you to stop and wait until it is safer.
If at all possible, have your partner pull over to the side of the road so you can finish. This way you won’t worry about causing an accident.
To swallow or not is a personal choice. Your first few times you might not want to swallow as it can be a new sensation and new taste.
The first time swallowing is usually the hardest, and once you get used to it, it isn’t too bad. Still, if this is beyond your comfort zone, simply have a towel near you so you can discretely spit out his deposit.
While it might not seem the sexiest act, you should use a condom if you are giving a person a blowjob who you have just met. Some STIs can be spread through oral sex Trusted Source Oral sex and transmission of non-viral STIs - PubMed Oral sex is a common sexual practice between both heterosexual and homosexual couples. Oro-genital sex is implicated as a route of transmission for gonorrhoea, syphilis, Chlamydia trachomatis, chancroid, and Neisseria meningitidis. pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov so you want to protect yourself.
Condoms are very thin and will still give your partner a satisfying sensation. To make it better for you, purchase flavored condoms. This will mask the latex taste of a condom.
The dream of most men is to be able to give themselves a blowjob whenever they want. However, unless you are incredibly flexible and incredibly fit, it simply isn’t possible.
The better way to achieve this sensation is to invest in a high-quality object like a fleshlight. There are many automatic options that provide a hands-free experience.
Here are a few scenarios to avoid when giving a blowjob.
Any form of sex should have plenty of communication with it. You need to be aware of your own needs, as well as your partner’s so that there is mutual satisfaction. As the person giving the blowjob, you have more control and therefore more power, but communication is still important.
Keep a steady pace that you both enjoy. You shouldn’t feel uncomfortable and your partner should feel pleasure. You can pay attention to subtle shifts in his body language or murmurs of agreement with him.
Sometimes, you may get too into the activity and lose control. While your partner may be up for a quickie, they may want to slow the action down. If you’re ever in doubt, pause for a moment and check in with your partner to see how he is feeling. Then, you can adjust your pace and tempo.
Sex is a mutual activity. There should never be a disparity in power unless both people agree to this ahead of time. That being said, there may be times when one person is the recipient and one person is the giver.
We aren’t saying this to mean you should offer your services whenever your partner demands them. What we are saying, however, is that if you’re comfortable with giving a blowjob and not expecting anything in return at that moment, that is okay.
If you do find that you are the one who is performing more oral sex than your partner, or that your sexual needs are not being met, this is not okay and you should bring up the subject matter. But sometimes it’s nice to surprise your partner for their birthday, or just because.
After a while, you may think that you’re in a rut. But if both people are happy, maybe you have just reached a point in your relationship where you know each other’s needs and how to meet them.
Learning how to give a blowjob can take a bit of time but once you’ve mastered it and know exactly how to wow your partner, there’s no need to search for some radical new way of doing it. It’s okay to simply stick to what you know if that is what your partner likes.
Subtle changes are always encouraged and so are experimenting with toys and techniques. But don’t feel like you need to change your technique for no reason.
While change isn’t necessary if there aren’t any issues if you do feel like things are becoming stale, or if your partner just doesn’t seem as enthusiastic as before, these might be signs that you should think about changing some things.
The first step is to always talk to each other. Perhaps your partner wants you to go faster or slower. Maybe you used to do something special and you forgot what that was, so your partner can remind you.
If you feel comfortable, watch a porno together. While they are definitely not the most realistic, they may inspire you to try something together. Adding toys is always beneficial and can spice things up further.
One of the biggest aspects of a blowjob is not using teeth. Hard and able to scratch, teeth need to be avoided. Step one in perfecting a blowjob is learning how to move your lips to cover your teeth.
Your partner should be understanding if you accidentally become too excited and your teeth come out, but this should not be a regular occurrence. Just think about how your partner’s teeth would feel on your own nether regions and keep them firmly tucked away.
We’re all guilty of trying to multitask but there are some times when you really need to focus on the task, or in this case, the job, in front of you. Our final tip in our how to give a blowjob tutorial is all about focus. Add some intimacy when giving your partner a blowjob by turning off the TV, putting away your phone, and making the moment only about the two of you.
If your bedroom is near the kitchen, you can try to eliminate any bad odors that can work their way through the house. Even something as simple as ensuring your phones are on silent mode so that neither of you is tempted to check your notifications can help set the mood. Giving a blowjob shouldn’t seem like a chore. Rather, it should be seen as a way to grow the connection between you and your partner.
Giving a blowjob shouldn’t be looked at as a task that you have to do. Instead, it should be set up as an experience that you want to do. The more involved with the action you are, such as more kissing, massaging, and teasing, can make you more aroused. You can view a blowjob as an act that needs to result in your partner orgasming, or you can play around and give part of a blowjob on your way toward intercourse. Play around with positions and toys and have some fun. There is no right or wrong way in knowing how to give a blowjob. The key is communicating with your partner and ensuring that both of you are comfortable.
